The In-between

There is a certain moment in our our growth, that subtle change, when we learn to stop wondering. Our sense of wonder fades as we enter into normalcy. Everything appears normal. Boringly normal.

It is good to stop a while and revisit my self. Just when did I learn to stop wondering about the world around me? When did I stop looking up the sky and look at the many shapes that the clouds form or ask what's beyond the stars? When did I stop to be amazed at how my feet firmly holds the earth and not float away into space? In the distant past, the world was full of wonders. It was full of magic. It was full of adventures.

I remember getting excited riding the jeep. Now, travel's become a bore and the sights that pass before my eyes remain but a passing blur. I remember the joy of being under the rain and drinking it. Now, the rain brings gloom and inconvenience. What happened in between?

The in-between, the mysterious in-between, tells me how easy it is to forget. It tells me how easily we grow up to become boring adults. It tells me how time can dull our sense of wonder simply because we begin to take things for granted. Now I wonder how'd I react if the sky were to disappear from the ceiling of earth, or that there'd be no rain under storm clouds.

I see it an invitation for me to always practice gratitude and to wonder again at the beauty and magic of the world. Seeing more than what we see can open our eyes to the treasure that had long sat in front of us.

Nakama

"All Relationships are about trust." It struck me strongly that I can't help but reflect on my own experience of relationships. The latest roller coaster ride with relationship I had gave me the strongest lessons I have learned so far. There can be no relationship without trust.


This made me reminisce the friends I had made through the years. Most of them were good and healthy friendships. Some are just casual that I could have nurtured more. A few were broken by immaturity then. These many friends, and their memory, had made me cope with life more easily because they shared the experience of life with me. This sharing is an exchange of trust. I am grateful that they had trusted me and they have kept my trust in return.


One of the popular manga around, Bleach, gave a very beautiful reflection on friendship. To the characters, a friend is a "nakama", someone who shares a deep bond. To them friendship is an exchange of hearts so that wherever you are your friends' hearts stays with you. 


I believe it is true. Friendship is a sharing not just of hearts but of persons and that makes it beautiful because you get to encounter another person, another beautiful being, and you share each other's being without losing your own individuality.


How I wish it were true for all my friends and all my relationships in general. I once said to a confrere, "When I die, I want to be remembered as a person who loved the best way he can." To all those whom I have hurt before, I am sorry, it is not who I wished to be. To all my friends now, I want you to know I am living for you too. Life is too beautiful to be wasted on negativities. It would be better to spend it on loving, learning, and living.

How do you eat an elephant?

How do you eat an elephant?

I've heard this question before. At first I was caught in surprise thinking it would be impossible no matter how big your appetite is. Wait, now some familiar faces are popping in my mind… The answer by the way is piece by piece.

Sometimes, upon facing a very big challenge, we are simply stumped. We realize how little we are and how big the problem is. Then doubts come pouring in, confidence erodes, and self-trust vanishes into thin air. Isn’t this our usual experience? The world seems to be filled with so many problems and too few people to solve it.
As the saying goes, a journey of a thousand miles begin with a simple step, maybe we all just need to take that first step of faith. It may be far, it may be big, but the first step is the start of its conquest. I believe we are all called to face our daily challenges and do something about it rather than cry all day in our helplessness.
This is what I learned as I faced the mammoth Philosophy. Forgive me, but many times I'm a coward, and as I face my studies, I tremble at the thought of de Universa. I have heard stories of post-novices jittering and jokes of brothers who faint in front of the panel of professors. My first dive, my first step, into the waters of Philosophy may have brought shivers but once I was inside the water, I realize I know how to swim and I know I can reach the next shore.

Stupid me, there is no reason to rush things. De Universa is years away, there is ample time to prepare. I’m still at the bottom of the ladder, I’ll face things as they come.

Piece by piece, that's it. We don't have to take everything all at once. Take one piece of life a day, munch it, relish it, and gulp it in. After days of taking a small piece at a time, what looked like an elephant before has become a teeny-weeny mouse. An impossible task has become a delightful meal called life.